Self-control, an executive function, is an aspect of inhibitory control which is the ability to regulate one’s emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in the presence of temptations and impulses. Self-control is a cognitive process that regulates one’s behavior and is necessary to control one’s behavior to avoid undesirable temptations,  destructive impulses and achieve one’s goals. It is almost impossible to achieve a long-term goal without a goodly amount of self-control because temptations are everywhere that you look or go. Temptations in the form of advertisements are on television, your phone, your laptop, books, magazines, or any other social media that you tune into. Even your family and friends are a source of temptation, so what is one to do in the presence of all of this temptation. There are things that one can do to develop more resolve and self-control or self discipline over one’s behaviors and actions. 

Some of the actions one can take to avoid temptations and undesirable impulses are: distraction techniques or redirect one’s focus, use positive affirmations, learn to manage your emotions and understand how emotions affect your thinking and behaviors. For example, when one has a habit of having an alcoholic beverage after work and decide to quit, an example of avoiding the temptations and impulses that one might experience from alcoholic desires is to skip the displays of alcoholic beverages in stores, print, or commercials because seeing displays or pictures of alcohol can trigger your desire to drink alcoholic beverages. Another effective measure to avoid the temptations to drink alcoholic beverages is to change your daily routines where alcohol was involved, such as having a drink when you first get home to relax with or meeting your friends after work at the neighborhood pub. Distract yourself from having that drink by exercising, reading, social media, gardening, or anything other than an alcoholic drink. You may even be able to substitute another kind of drink and be fine because of experiencing the routine of drinking, it is often the routine of having that drink that triggers us to drink. Learning to manage and understand your emotions and the effects they have on your thinking and behaviors is a very effective way to cope with temptations and impulses, but it requires a lot of introspection and growth. You may gain the necessary understanding and ability to manage your emotions from counseling, metaphysics, or NLP techniques which help you to identify what triggers that makes you want to have an alcoholic drink.

I am talking about the habit of having an alcoholic drink and wanting to break the habit. I am not referring to alcoholism because I am not qualified to diagnose or treat alcoholism. I am surprised that this is where my dialogue went, but I trust spirits guidance. Millions of people have their evening drink to relax with and are perfectly happy with the process and that is fine. Some people want to stop the routine for whatever reason and that is who I am addressing here. Maybe you want to drop the calories and carbs that are in the drinks or perhaps you don’t always stop with one or two drinks, whatever the reason, the solution is the same.

Positive affirmations are a good tool to change one’s behaviors when used daily with a true desire for change. If you knew that anger made you self-destructive which led to you drinking alcohol, then use affirmations that address anger and self-destructive behavior. Ask yourself why anger causes you to be self-destructive, why can’t you focus your anger in a constructive way such as a calm dialogue. What prevents you from expressing your anger? The more you understand what triggers your anger the more control you can develop over it and how you behave. Why do you feel the need to internalize your feeling of anger? Perhaps you were not allowed to express your anger as you grew up and the programming this stored in your subconscious prevents your expressing anger now. If this is true then work on releasing stored anger and programming that says you can’t express your anger verbally. Take classes in anger management, get counseling, seek some kind of therapy, or read many self-help books on anger issues, use spiritual or metaphysical training to learn how to cope with your anger in a constructive way.

Some of us have issues with authority and we rebel at anything that tries to exert control over our actions or behaviors, even when it is us trying to control our behavior. An example is when I want to lose weight and I want to eat differently, more healthier, my appetite goes into warp speed and I want to eat everything in sight.  I know that I am not hungry and that it is just my programming rebelling at the attempt to control what I eat. I use positive affirmations about eating healthy foods and about feeling full with my appetite sated. I do not think about dieting I just ease into eating differently because the word “diet” is a trigger for me. The most important thing to do is to work on the resistance to authority because many, many things have authority over our physical plane.  We as energy beings are free. Affirmations of the truth of us as an energy being, and the freedom that comes with that [of being that] alleviates some of the resistance to authority.

Self-control can be achieved, mastered and lived with, but how much self-control does one want.  For each of us this may vary because of our ego, and personality which influences our sense of self and how much self- control we choose to experience. Too much self-control can suppress our creativity. It is desirable to have enough self-control over ones behavior and actions to keep others and oneself safe and to conduct oneself with an acceptable amount of decorum. Self-control is necessary to accomplish ones goals and can be a very positive attribute, but one needs the freedom to fully utilize their creativity. So explore and discover what amount of self-control works best for you and try to balance it with the freedom that you desire to be creative.

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